Why is Anne Hathaway famous?
This perplexing question could keep you awake on many a night with the mental
picture of her nightmarishly goggly eyes and Chesire Cat smile embedded in your
retinas. This celebrity conundrum is made all the more baffling if you type
Hathaway’s name into Netflix or Amazon and view any of her dismal movies.
You could be sitting there in
front of your TV well into the early hours with a magnifying glass, some
anti-depressants, and the IMDb app and still not figure out why Anne Hathaway
is working in Hollywood.
With the exception of A
Devil Wears Prada, Anne hasn’t made a single film worth watching. She churns
out non-stop trash like a high-rise garbage chute and yet for some unknown
reason she’s a highly-paid, award-winning actor. With her grandfather a radio
personality and her mother an actress, it makes you wonder if nepotism has
anything to do with her becoming famous because it quite clearly isn’t her star quality (of which she has none).
Looking like an Afghan Hound
suffering from epiphora and with a smile that resembles something from an Aphex
Twin music video, Anne’s unvarying expression spans whole film genres – from
musicals, science fiction, drama to comedy – that samey look is present in
everything she appears in.
I wonder if it’s because Anne
Hathaway shares her name with William Shakespeare’s wife, maybe casting
directors and producers in Hollywood keep hiring her thinking she’ll bring
something of the Bard to her latest film. What they end up with however is her
same-same performance; slightly cheerful, slightly bemused, slightly
teary-eyed, her acting is identical whether she’s a masked superhero, a party
girl, or a frigging chief scientist.
With Hathaway attracting so
much internet hate over the years including anti-fan-clubs and Facebook pages
(known as “Hathahaters”) as well as a few hashtags (#hathahater and #hathahate)
there’s just something about the actor that rubs people the wrong way. And
whether it’s her face, her personality, or something altogether different, it
can’t be ignored that large swaths of people just can’t stand Anne Hathaway.
Having successfully climbed
the Hollywood ladder over the years, the mainstream media of course have to
protect their investment so recently there’s been a concerted effort to try and
dissuade and even silence her critics (or “haters” as the media disparagingly
labels them). But just because the first page of Google is now filled with
praise and anti-criticism, it’s hard to overlook that many people still detest
For me, the idea of
“unwarranted” hatred is bit of a distraction. Sure, Anne Hathaway has never
said or done anything (at least as far as I know) to warrant actual loathing
and hostility but her overrated acting and her tediously similar performances
are enough to pause for thought and question why she’s a highly sought-after
actor. And did I mention that god-damn smug smirk of hers? It’s simply annoying
to look at especially given her largely disappointing filmography. I mean what
is she so happy about? Making non-stop celluloid-shite?
Looking like someone tried to
sculpt Mädchen Amick out of a block of Wensleydale cheese on a hot day, Anne
Hathaway is not exactly someone you want to look at for prolonged periods of
time and repeated 90-minute viewings of her irksome mush should make everybody
question her ranking and status in Hollywood.