A leading dating expert has revealed the mathematically correct way of figuring out when you’ve found ‘the one’ – and it’s all about learning how to set a benchmark.
Hinge’s Director of Relationship Science Logan Ury, from California, is familiar with the plight of second thoughts and worrying you’ve already lost the love of your life.
‘When you’re dating, how do you know when you’ve found the right person?’ she asked.
‘You might not want to commit too early in your dating journey, since you don’t know who’s out there – but if you wait too long, trying to do years of research, the pool of potential partners gets smaller.’
Luckily, Logan revealed the mathematically correct way to know when to stop and commit to someone.
The relationship expert offered up a metaphor of hiring someone to be your personal assistant.
How to know you have found ‘the one’
‘Imagine you’re hiring a secretary – you have 100 candidates, you have to evaluate each one, one at a time. After every person, you have to say yes or no – you can’t go back to a previous candidate.
‘At what point do you hire someone? If you hire too early, you don’t know what’s out there. If you hire too late, maybe all the great people have already passed.’
Logan shared that according to statistics, you should first interview 37 per cent of people and figure out who the best person was out of the pool.
‘That’s now your benchmark person – the next time you find someone you like as much or more, you should hire them,’ she said.
And the same thing applied to dating.
‘If you’ve already dated a lot of people, think about who your benchmark person is.
‘The next time you find someone who you like as much or more, commit to them and don’t keep worrying about who else is out there.’
Thousands thanked Logan for sharing her wisdom.